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Written by Bhav Nancherla I'm inspired to use this space to have some of my colleagues, clients, and friends share some of their own writing. Below we have our first guest post by Luminosity alum, Bhav Nancherla*.  Where does love go when shame swallows it? Here are two moments when eros and shame danced together in my life, and what I’m learning about their entanglement…
A few months ago, sitting on a plane just before take off, I suddenly and very unexpectedly felt this huge effusion of sexual energy, as though I was feeling the thrust of the plane as a force in my own body, translated through the erotic. This had never happened to me before, and I was surprised and frankly, a little aghast. As I sat there, wedged way too close in space to two other passengers’ bodies, something else in me took over with the energy of “this is so deeply inappropriate, it cannot be allowed to happen,” after which I watched a powerful energy within me fold these sensations up, so completely disappearing them as if they had never occurred. How exacting a force is shame: how deeply it can entwine and contain these powerfully evocative impulses towards generativity, towards risk, towards pleasure. Many years ago, in a season of significant chaos and messy boundaries, I made a choice that caused a lot of hurt to someone I loved. On the other side of this transgression, in the remorse of the hurt I’d caused, I used shame as incantation: sitting in front of a mirror, I cast a spell of shame to call myself back into a shape that was more coherent than the messy reality that was unfolding. I’m not saying if it was a good or bad thing - but it was extreme and effective. It called me back into containment. Was it the right move to fit back into that shape? I don’t know; it certainly didn’t undo the hurt, nor could it stop what had unfolded, even if it did change the course going forward a bit. I think a lot about the role of shame in the complexity of its heavy medicine and its powerful ability to close in around the unfolding of life. From somatics, I’ve learned how life pulses through existence - a series of expansions and contractions: the inhale and exhale of breath, the beating of our hearts, the tightening and softening of muscles and organs in every movement we make. The same phenomenon guides energy between bodies: life unfolds as enlivening expansion into new possibilities, and then orients to (re)containment, as we integrate and make sense of what has happened, and feel out how this growth fits into who we know ourselves to be. This pulsing feels in relationship with life and death, with love and grief, with movement and stillness, and I’d invite, with the energies of eros and shame. Where eros invites us to unlock and move into new possibilities, shame brings us to contain and integrate back into oneself. This is how life tangles with the individual ego, this small and precarious container of self, present in the question that shame can often ask: “who do you think you are?”
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 I’m leaving The Outside. After nearly a decade of amazing work and friendship, June 30 will be my last day at the organization I have loved hard and that has loved me back in kind.
It’s time. I've been doing two kinds of work for a long time: the more visible strategic work and a quieter, deeper practice that's been growing underneath it. Now, I want to let what's been growing come forward. It’s time. My decision didn't come with a perfectly mapped road ahead. What it came with was the clarity that something in me has been growing that can no longer be secondary. It deserves a front and center role in what I’m offering to the world. It’s time. And because I am who I am, I’m thinking about all of the “lessons” I am learning from this leave taking. So that I can truly learn them, and also so that I can share them with you. But a funny thing has happened - probably because I’m still in the middle of this life changing shift! - all I can really capture is what NOT to learn from my leaving. So I’ll share that instead. |
TUESDAY RIVERAHello there! This resource page is a space for me to share inspiration, insight, and connection. Here, I’ll offer reflections and practical guidance related to personal transformation, intuitive practices, and embracing the divine feminine as well as other topics that have my attention. Whether you’re seeking insight, a bit of encouragement, or tools for transformation, I hope you find meaningful content here to guide your journey. CategoriesArchives
May 2026
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